On Saturday I may give surfing another try if plans work out. I tried once just over a year ago without much (any) success and am not holding my breath (ha!) this time out either. Of course this means entering the Australian ocean which is, more or less, a death trap. Over there in the right column you will see that there have been at least 6 shark attacks since I arrived here in August (and I’ve likely missed a couple). And if the sharks leave you alone, you still have the bluebottles, the crocodiles, the dingos….

In order to keep swimmers and surfers safe, 51 beaches in New South Wales are protected by shark nets, and I use the term “protected” VERY loosely. Basically a shark net is stretched along the seabed near a beach in order to prevent sharks from entering the shallow waters and eating me. Until a couple of hours ago I was under the impression that these nets reached from the seabed right up to the surface…I mean what’s the point otherwise right? If a shark can just casually swim by a net, scoffing at it’s inherent uselessness, than why bother at all?

During a crappy reality based Bondi rescue show (which I was only watching because House came on next) some guy, who looked rather unqualified to do anything but surf, dove down to “check the net” to make sure nothing was stuck in it. On this little voyage below the surface (followed by cameras of course) I see that a shark net does not even come close to reaching the surface. It sits on the bottom, reaches up about 10 feet, then…nothing. Sharks are perfectly capable of swimming up to the shore of Bondi to hang out with the Icebergs.

Now I’m actually against shark nets, so the fact thay they seem useless in addition to being harmful to so much sea life kinda pisses me off. I looked up “shark net” on wikipedia to learn more and read this:

It is said that 35 – 50% of the sharks are entangled from the beach side.

Brilliant! Kill the ones that are leaving the beach!

As far as I’m concerned, if you are worried about being eaten by a shark, don’t go swimming in Australia. And if you are worried and you still want to swim, just take your fatter, slower-swimming friend with you. That’s my plan for Saturday.